Book of Wine & Seizures by WC Smith Book 6 The Industrious Godowner Ch 7- Man Hath God and Dog

The Journal of Provincial Thought

luminance

A Man Hath a God, and a Dog Hath He

nd Siriul Merta took Beuel to live with the dog Paul at his sister’s house, there finding turn to cast out again Krayven Merta and her man Chariot Wheel the

Assrider, who were taken up abode therein duringst the awaysiad of Siriul Merta. I needs must hone finer mine awaymanship, saith he, that it shine not as a beacon to the dispossesst, inviting them unto mine empty premises.

And in the deep night prayd Siriul Merta unto the god Azhor, which were a god greater than Beuel, having better power, and suffring little occasien for men, being disproportionate engage’d with beings elsawheres, yet willing to entretain exsepsionel proposals here upon the earth.

And Azhor came and causd ice to hang in the house of Merta, and fraze the spidars in their webs with their mouths all full of bug. And he said unto Siriul Merta, I have deliverd thy

victry, Merta. Now commence therefore to raise for me my two ivory towers, and bring me my three hundreds weepy worshippors, deluxe riders of the pew, as thou hast binded thy self to do.

And Siriul Merta bow-ed and said unto him, I shall, I shall.

And Azhor said, Let this be knowen, Siriul Merta, that Azhorre—which is I—stride higher, faster, farther than that halfgod beuel which I for thee have threwn down; and when that thou hast besought mine hand against him, thy prayers were ansert widouts the riddols & diddels of other gods. Forsooth! see little lord beuel out there scratching. Truly now mayest thou to say, My god is beuel. For, sure, he belongeth now unto thee, as thine own taxabol personalty or realty. (For Ashor were in sense of local law.)

And Azhor said further, Now I do suppose that thou wilt be hauling away thy sculpted items pertaining unto beuel, having no incent to worshipf them. Thou wilt be finding some items now which pertain unto me, I suppose, and worshopping those.

And Siriul Merta answerd & said, Lord, sure I will. Do not I do those things I do?

And Azhor departed, saying, My day of renown is returnd unto this place; I know neither whether to weep, sigh, or multiplye. (But he choos-ed to multiplye, of course.)

Now lo, Siriul Merta sold not his images of Beuel, but kept them to worship; for dear through recent days hath he striven to learn the rites, and he knoweth none of those weirdlin ululatiens pertaining unto Azhor. And more, ’twere unseemly to worshipf the Mean Head idols like unto snarling Azhor, whom childrens fear as devillari-o’-th’-off-diviney. Men may be raspt with pumice for their such truckings in malspiritus, when caught by the righteous who carry pumice or by other load-bearing members of a sociedy crying out for purer worshippy. Merta him self hath raspt a few, on nought more than his righteous malspiritus-suspisiens and some lateral motives.

Now, on the morn went Siriul Merta forth outen his sister’s house to scan the estate. And he did pitcht meat unto the dog Paul, and converst with the god Beuel, which never ate nor slep-ed, being an immortol divinidy; rather, sat Beuel in almo palpabol silence, and returning the gaze of all who pass-ed, they who went awhispring, Is that not the Lord there huncht in that kennel?

And Merta took on the visage of the straind, who feign the pain of a balancing of the burden of enormous ironies. And he said unto Beuel, Uneasy. Uneasy were the way I certain feel, to say any thing to thee just here & now. So I needs beseech thy suffrance. Time is the Push Happeneer that causeth things to hapfen; and in time shall I not so balk to command thee freely, as befitten the proprietor of cage-ed deity. But, for the moment, lord, be a friend unto Paul here, of late abandon’d by his slatternly mistress my sistress; make for him food & water, which chore for me lieth in a class of nuisence, I now of station. Also, wud that thou remove his dungs unto some other yarde; an thou be caught by irksome naybers, turn them also into dungs and mixxe them in. These I do despise, taxes & Nessassiny the mother of Envincius & irksome naybours; for they are not of the world of my dreams.

O, but thou, master Beuel (saith Merta), thou art in my dreams and the world of my making. There is little of thee that in time I wud not aske. For now, wash thou offen this Paul the filth & nast that rusheth upon him from all parts of the unoverse, that it not whelm this house & nation. Against his brutish will, keep him sweet & dainty. I shall bring sweetpowders for the dark odours of his body—but nay, rather thou create & apply them, using goddy powers. Conjure a fragrance from remote blooming vales, an aroma to spank the zone with curing air.

Take thou an free hand, lord, with Paul’s wellobeing. Teach him the law. Imbue in this slavering monstrossody the manner of a grand spirit, that he give up all his slinking. Nurture his esteem in his own dogdom, in ways that I cannot; and his esteem in whatsoever he seeth at work in me. Examine and exsplode his horrors, assuage them with comedy. Punctuate principol with delightful digressien. Lead him ever to the willing bitch. All, I say, for the sake of the dog, sallah.

Whatte else (saith Merta). Yea, there is Sister. An Krayven Merta return unto this fortress with her man Chariot Wheel, know thou that to do: snapf thy fingor, spread thy supranormol hands and giganticise the rise & run of this house, e’en at exspense of nayboring plots, that the three of us may dwell some wheres herein during naturol life, though in such remove that encounter them ne’er I do, they in their constant urgent murk & spectacol. But suffer neither any other assriders to enter herein. Face them down with face, and with threats (including live demenstratia partisipatorio) of conversien to barrels of millet—a gruesum final state, in some respects, for dolts who lay so muche in freedem. Utt, utt, utt (Merta chortleth).

Now (saith Merta). I have in mind a pestilence to foist upon the lentil field of Envincius and his brittle mother Nessassiny (O! she that spurn-ed any advanse I chanst to run upon her). Split thou thy personalidy, Butt—may I call thee Butt?—and send forth one of thee unto the gnag Nessassiny to bargain, saying, Well, a bit of pestilence is on, to the clip of nine tenths thy crop; and thou shalt look back evermore upon the Year of the Bad, fieldwise, for the slopp that thou hast pumpft upon the magnificent Killsayer Merta. But say unto her this, also: If an thou wudst to save the tenth, then gae thou unto the house of Merta each evening with thy pans to wash his feet, and the feet of whosoever sitteth aroundabouts, as feet become leatherd with grot & grewe in treading street, latrine, & vermin lair. The adventcheris toe, soilt & sweating, cleanseth not him self. Now, if an Siriul Merta be away, and not at home, no matter; there will be feet to wash, some where in the house. The chickans, too, cud use the attentien.

And during these things, lord Beuel (saith Merta)—through thy dazzlery & fetchfar means, in that concurrent moment with them—send one of thee to pull up two ivery temples for thy colleague Azhor: the one atop the other, and the one neath the other; the one above, and the other below; one high, and one low; upsen, and downerds; o’er, and under; aloft, and subtendifract. Imprison therein three hundreds vagrants and foaming cankards sick with the cank—whatsoever thou canst find about to roust up with the oppertunidy of their lifes: to worship with utmo fervor, or to die. For this is reasoning that paepels hereabout do understand. (Deluxe? Show him graphics of my loaf; that is deluxx.) And set about these temples magic gorillas to gauge & spur the worshipry; I mean it be profound and evercranking.

Now, I know (saith Merta unto Beuel) that, as in thine own case, no god estoopeth to the ungodly hilareous and buildeth his own tempule, nor rousteth up his own worshippers, lest all the other godds laff him outen existence. For these are the crucial proofstuffs of goddiery, that worshoppors come, they come, will free; and by & by, will free, ’tis they—them selfs or by dint of their enslave’d—who build the tempols. It all maketh sense unto me. Yet, may not ye gods, being beings of utilidy, go and build it for each another, as an matter of plain physicks? Yea, if’n I so say; and lo, I do, ’tis that I heard me saying.

Then nexte & meanawhiles, Beuell, go with me in thy third splittoon unto tavrens & drunkardries, to perform and bet and alter time. There shall come no end to mine aggrandissiment [ə-gron-deesee-mah]. Be thou ever watchful at my back, preserving me from hurt. Turn aside the flashing dagger, transmute to fluff the zipping whipstick, set the whizzing arrow and the rolling weapon back upon their looser. And through it all, O lord & boy, reel out thy sweet spool of patience towards me, for I am the hard case. See that thou forgive me my blunders, pardon all my frenche, nightly sweep the streets of my daily transgressiens. This do widouts rancor and old animosities. NAY, one better: Come thou before me upon thy knees, begging leave to Forgive me, and we shall see. I believe that I shall say, Yea, forgive me, then. For what man relisheth the thoght of Hell that cometh of going abouts unforgiven?