 Snappy swingster Kozee fronts his big band while teasing and torturing slow-witted Yiddish komik IshKeBobble until he has a psychotic episode. Big $$$ on vapid quiz for audience stooges.
 Musical quiz based on one or two notes of ancient warhorses once played by palm court orchestras and Salvation Army bands. Derisory prizes, no cash.
 Obscenely untalented people rounded up for mass humiliation, usually dragged offstage with well-honed boathooks. Often leads to huge Hollywood or Broadway contracts and vast personal fortunes.
 A panel of snooty chrome-domes with Einstein complexes compete to rant and drivel when asked fairly simple and innocent questions about trivial facts. Cheapo prizes. Host: Cliffie Fatman.
 Obnoxious lads and lassies lisp and prevaricate, sometimes blundering into vaguely correct answers for blindingly obvious conundrums. Very few $$$ or ¢¢¢. Host: Peter Pringle.
 Really low-budget show with contestants drawn from the ranks of those suffering from Asperger’s Syndrome, Tourette’s Syndrome or Hatter’s Shakes. Maximum prize: 64¢.
 Ancient vaudeville hack Grummpo Mackie insults and abuses naïve hayseeds gullible enough to sign on. Famous for catchphrase: “Hit 'em with a duck!” Low-rent prizes.
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